paper bag of produce

what a great name for a band! paper bag of produce.... i haven't even had coffee yet either.

so, had martinis last night here with my pal, heather. where to start? i have so many blog posts in just this one evening. i'll try to pick out the interesting things and leave the things that seemed funny to us...wait maybe those things bleed together? shut up. don't read if you don't want to.

first off, i should explain that in the interest of avoiding confusion, heather vanK has now dubbed herself: bunny. i think this is funny on so many levels. mostly because it is such a ridiculous name. anyway, since i know two heathers and i text with both of them quite often i was explaining that i got confused when one interjected a text within the context of a conversation i was having with the other. (yes, i could read the last name, but basically i see heather and that's enough) so she immediately piped up: i'll be bunny. and so it was....

we had a great evening of laughing and chatting. sitting out on the patio till we were cold. wrestling because bunny said something very, very offensive to me. ripping on the poor service from the waitress who wanted to leave and the great service from the bartender. i guess i had a little bit of crush on him. bunny thought he was too skinny. i immediately said, well i don't want to sleep with him, i just like him. (thanks, mark for keeping the martini's flowing AND for putting the tab on the right card).

so, hands up whomever thinks a) winning bets while drinking is the best and b) paper napkin diagrams of lady parts makes for fun and a little bit of awkwardness. so i won't get into details about why we were drawing diagrams of lady parts on napkins, but it's not what you think, pervs. it was more a lesson in anatomy. anyway, that's really not the point of the story. the point is, the rad bartender mark walked up just as bunny was hunched over intently working on the diagram, explaining and enlightening me. she was startled and a little embarrassed when a fresh martini was delivered during the art lesson. mark being the cheeky fella he is said: oooh, that's a very nice drawing.

since bunny was 4 martini's in, she was certain mark had seen the diagram in detail. i submitted that he was too far away to see any detail. so we bet the next bar tab that he had no idea what was on the napkin. bunny was disappointed when she trotted over to the bar to find what mark had seen that i was indeed correct. so, save your pennies, kiddo. you are treating me to martini's next time.

ok, last part. as i picked the victim up last night, she came out with a bag of stuff. it smelled like onions and i said, "why are you putting onions in my car?" she said, "don't you like onions?" i said, "i like onions, but not in my car" she said, "oh, yeah i guess. want me to leave 'em here and we can pick them up when you drop me off?" i said, "uh, kinda yeah". so after a night of chatting and drinking, i found myself standing in the kitchen munching on organic veggies. green beans, tomatoes, carrots and zucchini. what a great gift. thanks, pal for sharing with me from your garden. hope you don't have a sore head today.